Remember the “Friends” episode where the characters each come up with their “freebie list”? They’re allowed five celebrities who, given the opportunity, they could sleep with–with no repercussions from their significant other.
Luc and I have joked over the years about who might be on our freebie lists, but here for the first time, we’re writing it down.
(Not sure if that makes it legally binding, but here’s the fine print: List is current as of today. Subject to change. Parents and in-laws, please stop reading NOW.)
1. Brad Pitt: Long haired or short, bearded, goateed or clean-shaven, scruffy in Snatch or suave in Ocean’s Eleven (or Twelve) (or Thirteen for that matter), Brad just cannot look anything but gorgeous. He was on my freebie list 20 years before I even knew what a freebie list was.
2. Johnny Depp: As long as Johnny is still living and breathing, no other man on the planet Earth should be awarded People magazine’s title of “Sexiest Man Alive.” Friends who mocked me back in the 90s (OK, as far back as the 80s) for finding him attractive please take note: he has been given this designation not once, but twice now. Apologies accepted.
3. Matthew McConaughey: Why do I go see every movie he’s in? Is it the chiselled cheekbones? The always perfectly tousled hair? The Texas drawl? OK, who am I kidding, it’s the abs. The rock solid, sinewy six-pack. Title? Co-star? Plot? Who cares. It’s all about Matthew with his shirt off.
4. Bradley Cooper: There’s “He’s so hot, I’d do him in a minute.” And then there’s “He’s so hot I’d do him in the cafeteria in front of my mother.” Is Bradley that hot? Yes. Yes he is.
5. Whatever actor is ultimately cast to play Christian Grey in the film version of Fifty Shades of Grey. Channing Tatum? Sure. Christian Bale? OK. Ryan Gosling? Why not! Assuming he takes his role seriously and goes through rigorous training for it (kinda like Brad Pitt did for Fight Club) I’d be more than happy to help him put his new–ahem–skills to use if he showed up on my doorstep…whoever he may be!
We can’t be the only happily married couple with a freebie list…who’s on yours?